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What I Forget When I'm Feeling Emotionally Rough

This goes out to everyone I know that has had a rough time at some point before or is experiencing that now. I offer you my solidarity.

1. Eating. I can go days without food. I become too upset for it and then it's too easy not to since I don't generally experience hunger/starvation like most people. (Yeah, my old therapist would have said to get me something yummy.)

2. Sisterly Commitments. I've got your back sister, I really do. I've just been waging an emotional war over the past several months. But I heard through the familial grapevine that you endlessly appreciate my English degree skillz so I can edit those essays for ya, no probs.

3. Hanging out with friends. I am not alone. Like, literally, I don't have to be alone. And sometimes I'm so down that hanging out with nearly anyone might help me feel better. Even though I would rather mope alone, I should probably do this because it makes a lot of sense. (And if you're a friend reading this, don't be afraid to ask me to hang out, alright? Maybe I'll say no but I'll still appreciate your asking.)

4. I am not the only one in this situation. My pain is not mine alone. So I don't have to feel physically alone, like no one is there for me, and I don't have to feel emotionally alone either. Someone else in the world is going through this exact thing. We will both survive it. We will both be stronger for it. (I salute you, my unknown counterpart in the ether!)

5. It does get better. Slowly, but surely. Gotta keep taking deep breaths often.

6. It will happen again. Yeah, probably. Life is cyclical. And next time I will be a little more prepared (hopefully). Even if this emotionally rough feeling happens all the time. I got this. You got this. We can make it. I really do believe that, even if I say otherwise. I am a hopelessly hopeful creature.

7. Pain becomes beauty. Real life (Er, living. Just living. Gonna try and keep doing that) inspires better art for me. I have lived new things now. Or old things in new ways. Rough times offer fresh takes on stuff I may not have been able to capture properly in creative endeavors before.

8. It's not all just over. People keep on moving. My thought patterns may change for the better. If I feel stuck, guttered, or abandoned - maybe the answer is to start moving - not literally, per se. But getting onto those things I want to get onto. Diving into unexplored interests, picking up old habits that served good purposes, or returning to what was working for me in happier times are all good places to start. I find that it's useful in the long term to ground myself in hobbies consistently. Because it's true that

You're a plant that will flower again. Hold on - because I want to see you bloom. I'm here for you. Promise.

© 2017 by Ameka Menes.

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